A warning to the phobic-babies

Babies, if you suffer from phobias, this is the thread to work that out.

Cootie shots also available

C'mon babies!

Jack, stop it!
People might be tempted to talk about babies afraid of the monstrous parents who drag them out to . . . well, anyway people might *talk* and start flame wars.

pitu wrote: Jack, stop it!

No I have the right to ruin your meal at a restaurant!

USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

Subject: another phobia

not to mention the fear of remaining 20 inches tall (or "long")

My vote would be for the fear of mean nasty old men who don't like to see kids on sidewalks or restaurants.

Ha ha (only kidding!)

The monsters at the co-op! Hands down.

germfree! wrote: The monsters at the co-op! Hands down.

The monsters negotiating with toddlers over snack food at the co-op!

pitu wrote: [quote=germfree!]The monsters at the co-op! Hands down.

The monsters negotiating with toddlers over snack food at the co-op!

The monster I once saw at the co-op who refused to buy little bags of the snack her daughter asked her nicely for because they she was waiting till the big bags came in so they wouldn't waste packaging! This is true.

Ah, the smell of misplaced, self-satisfied virtue in the morning.

That was me!

I have the right to ruin your trip to the co-op!

citizen jane wrote: The monster I once saw at the co-op who refused to buy little bags of the snack her daughter asked her nicely for because they she was waiting till the big bags came in so they wouldn't waste packaging! This is true.

Sounds like a load of hooey.

Let's stick to the topic.

Babies. And what scares them.

Jack, you are quite the taskmaster! You probably scare babies!

Jack wrote: [quote=citizen jane]The monster I once saw at the co-op who refused to buy little bags of the snack her daughter asked her nicely for because they she was waiting till the big bags came in so they wouldn't waste packaging! This is true.

Sounds like a load of hooey.

Let's stick to the topic.

You're right about sticking to the topic, but this really happened in the snacks aisle, about a year and a half ago.

All the babies looked terrified.

Now no more.

citizen jane wrote: You're right about sticking to the topic, but this really happened in the snacks aisle, about a year and a half ago.

I know. The legend is written in stone.

I'd really like anyone to compare something like that to real world child abuse.

Like, I saw little girl run to a tree--with low hanging branches--on Atlantic Avenue to simply approach a tree and get excited about nature. And her mom rips her away and starts beating the shit out of her right on the sidewalk.

And here's another gem. A group/family gets on the subway. The 7-year-old (or about that age) boy is holding a copy of MAXIM magazine. They had to run on the train to get on the train. And when they're on the train the kid is crying because in the process of getting on the train the kid copy of MAXIM magazine ripped. Can that be more surreal? Oh yes! The abusive father grabs the kid by the arm and practically lifts him off the ground and yells right to his "You see what happens! You ripped YOUR BOOK!" I don't know where the tragedy begins and end on that one.

And the list goes on and on.

I'm sick and tired of hearing people bash or hen-peck at the co-op because in the big picture there are worse things out there. And in the world of retail there is DEFINITELY more abuse of customers in other venues.

Please, get some perspective. Want to see cruel parents? Head over to Toys R Us in Herald Square on the last few days before Christmashannukwanza. A social workers nightmare!

And on topic. Babies are scared of Kirstie Alley in all of her girths and morphs.

Did I lose the plot? I was under the impression that this thread was light-hearted, and introducing the co-op to the mix was meant in that vein. The co-op has great stuff, etc, but it is also a constant source of mirth: co-op as punching bag is a local tradition, and a way to blow off steam. Why go all didactic on us in this venue? Do you seriously believe that the goings-on in aisle three consume us to the point that we are ignorant of all else? Give us some credit. And let us just muck around, when it's called for.

Back on topic: I read somewhere that hipsters scare babies.

Wow, Jack. Take it easy. I just intended to tell a (to me) amusing little anecdote about an overly serious shopper that I witnessed one day, not a tale of "child abuse" (?). It had nothing to do with the offerings at the co-op, the relationship between parent and child, and certainly not about abuse on any level. I was mocking the woman for overthinking her snack bag options. Overreact much?

Also, babies are afraid of Santa Claus in my experience.[/i]

Sorry for the lapse into seriousness. This thread was meant to 'take the piss out of' that other battling stroller thread.

Are babies afraid of...

Jack, you are a gentleman. I thought we WERE taking the piss! Well, as best we could with our undernourished board.

Don't even get me started on babies vs. CLOWNS.

germfree! wrote: Don't even get me started on babies vs. CLOWNS.

Oh my! We are soulmates in clown not-liking! I hate clowns more than anything! Probably so much that I didn't even enter them in the list!

Good lord! I can't stand them!

An actual clown used to live on my block! His moniker was "Bubbles" or "Soft Serve" (I wish). One never knew when he might emerge from his building, fully-clad in clownish clobber, on his sad, sad way to some underpaid gig. He never failed to make time to "entertain" any unsuspecting children caught in his crosshairs, and, subsequently, it was years before my children would so much as venture out without me running reconnaissance beforehand.

Now that's a truly deserved orange alert.

Oops! Did I veer off-topic? :oops:

I don't consider venting about clowns to be a problem. They are horrid!

But I must confess. At one point as a kid a friend's mom was a party clown. And in retrospect I realize I made sure not to visit their home when she was getting geared up for a gig.

Damned clowns.

I should elaborate: my vote is for human or animatronic Santas.

Short People.

I'm waiting for all the irate Park Slope clowns to get on their high horses and start defending themselves. Humourlessly.

germfree! wrote: I'm waiting for all the irate Park Slope clowns to get on their high horses and start defending themselves. Humourlessly.

:twisted: :twisted:

Your moma!

Clowns are appalling. To me they represent unmanageable insanity, nothing amusing. I'm thinking of making a line of big white cotton panties with this embroidery on them for those days when you want to be left alone:

sje wrote: Clowns are appalling. To me they represent unmanageable insanity, nothing amusing. I'm thinking of making a line of big white cotton panties with this embroidery on them for those days when you want to be left alone:

sje wrote: Clowns are appalling. To me they represent unmanageable insanity, nothing amusing. I'm thinking of making a line of big white cotton panties with this embroidery on them for those days when you want to be left alone:

How fantastically pervy! Please keep us informed.

germfree! wrote: How fantastically pervy! Please keep us informed.

Why, thank you! Will do. :twisted: