Homeless woman living in car - Bay Ridge

guest99

Anyone have suggestions - woman living in her car for past week. She doesn't want to go to homeless shelter. Says she goes to work during the day and then returns to her Hyundai with PA plates, to sleep, eat, etc. Called cops - the woman is still there. Isn't this illegal?

anastasia beaverhausen

Is she hurting anyone? Is she causing problems? If no, leave her be. I'm sure its humiliating enough to be homeless.

urbancowgirl

Yes. What Anastasia said. Come on...

guest99

You're making assumptions that this person is humiliated to be living in her car. I know nothing about her circumstances (mental or physical) and it's a shame that nothing has/can been done by the police. To suggest that I do nothing more is part of the problem.

whynot_31

homeless persons have complex problems; they rarely simply lack a home.

We also live in a society in which services (in the vast majority of situations) can only be provided to someone with their consent.

There are some exceptions. For example, the police are able to forcibly transport mentally ill people (who pose no threat to others) to shelters when a "code blue" is in effect (usually when the temperature drops below 10 degrees).

Likewise, if someone poses a more imminent threat to themselves (think disoriented on a subway platform, wandering in traffic, etc), they can bring them to a shelter or ER for evaluation.

...assuming they don't pose a threat to others, there are few other circumstances where they can forcibly remove a person.

...they can enforce rules: The park closes at 11 pm. You can not take up more than one seat on the subway. Etc.

...but so far you've described nothing about "car lady" that meets any of the criteria outlined.

A mental health system based on consent clearly has its drawbacks. The alternative, however, is worse. (Even if you disagree with that statement, you live in a society in which consent legally required 99% of the time.)

P.S. The struggle to define the rights of the public vs. the rights of the homeless has been going on since the beginning of time.... the pendulum will swing the other way in a while.

erpa

Sounds like you're more disturbed by her being there and less concerned for her living in her car. What exactly did you want the cops to do?

fancy

DON'T CALL THE POLICE. HELP HER, YOU MIGHT BE IN HER SITUATION ONE DAY, (OR ARE YOU ABOVE HARD TIMES)? PAY FOR A NIGHT IN A MOTEL FOR HER SO SHE CAN BATHE & SLEEP GOOD. OFFER HER MONEY.
PAY HER CAR INSURANCE, REGISTRATION, INSPECTION FEES.
H E L P H E R.

molly9094

if you see her again, try being prepared to be constructive to her situation, not destructive. Look up sites on the net that provide housing and social services and direct her towards them. If she can't use a phone while working, offer her help that way, and then do it. You won't regret helping her. My mom was in that situation but had a friend that took us all in, so I can relate, and probably some of us on this board, and certainly many of us in this country. Be kind, supportive, and give to her as well as yourself with a genuine act of caring and kindness.

guest99

Subject: FYI

Thanks for your answers. The neighbors have been more than kind to the woman. FYI - she is well dressed, has a cell phone, smokes cigarettes
(therefore she must have some money), refuses shelter. A phone call to the police - maybe she's a missing person, who knows?

I'm gathering that living from your car isn't illegal, so I guess there's not much more that can be done...a shame

whatchuwant

This reminds me of the guy who lives in his mobile home in Queens. It's legally registered vehicle which he moves for all the rules of the road (street cleaning, etc). Neighbors have complained that he's a nuisance. But, according to the laws, he's not breaking any. Neither is your lady.

You gotsa new neighbor!

scorpio

Subject: location homeless woman living in car

please let me know the location of the homeless woman living in her car. I have someone who may be able to help her.
thanks.

fverona

Subject: You are heartless.

I have been homeless, I have had to live in my car or stay at friends' houses for months at a time and I have a college education. I had terrible medical bills and a lay off that forced me out of my rented home but I guess none of that would matter to you. Guess what? Homeless people can have "nice" clothes, we get free cigarettes (I got mine from Camel reps in bars- completely free) and I had my car and a laptop that I kept after selling ALL of my belongings and furniture, because I knew it might mean a future job. But I couldn't afford more than $2 for food a day, a safe place to sleep, or even gas money sometimes.

SHAME ON YOU.

I cannot say that enough. You presume to know this woman's situation because she has a few modest possessions like cigarettes. SHAME ON YOU. I almost hope that one day you are in such a position, but I am not quite that cruel. Instead of offering help or even trying out the emotion of sympathy, you are complaining. Do you know how dangerous it is to live on the streets? Maybe your area affords this poor woman a modicum of safety. Is she harassing you? Dirtying your streets? No. She is merely an annoyance to your lifestyle. SHAME ON YOU. You are disgusting and a humiliation to the human race. Put yourself in the position of someone who has just lost EVERYTHING in their life other than a place to safely sleep, only to have another woman whine that they are inconveniently living in her proximity. My first thought is how to help this woman, yours is "who can I complain to??" Nauseating.

guest99

Subject: Re: location homeless woman living in car

scorpio wrote: please let me know the location of the homeless woman living in her car. I have someone who may be able to help her.
thanks.

Thank you. She has had a place to stay thru the weekend at least. Maybe more to come...

lostlookingforlife

As a sound-body-sound-mind man who is about to be officially homeless in a week, with no car or other makeshift shelter at my disposal and no source of income to help get out of this situation in short order (other than my will and determination to work at it), I am frightened, but not surprised by the perspective and initial response of guest99. I am not surprised because although we are aware of the homeless situation in this city and we are taught to, and express the position of a person who wants to, help and care, the real and stark truth is we protect ourselves first, often ensuring a buffer between us and the affected. This often means that we want to ensure that our home and "valuables" are verified to be protected first, and, in some instances, a situation as described by guest99 can often elicit a defensive and protective reaction - i.e., having them removed by authorities to a shelter or similar, but the key is that they are removed from a resident's immediate area.

I don't know where I will go, how I will support myself or get out of my impending situation eventually, but I know that the very image described in this thread is one that I think of frequently, and I want to do everything in my power to NOT pose a threat to people like guest99. I want people to feel comfortable enough to help, not hide me, so I can work comfortably to put this new type of life experience behind me as soon as possible.

(yes, my self-esteem could use some work)

I'm not sure if I am making sense here, but I am experiencing this side of life for the first time from this side, and so many thoughts, emotions and feelings are passing through me. I apologize if I have offended anyone.

digitalprincess

Lost...I'm sorry that you are struggling....There are a lot more people than most of us are aware who are just one paycheck or set of circumstances away from being homeless.

I'm not sure that this will be helpful to you, or if you are looking for and/or able to work, but if you are, you might want to check out some of the Census jobs that are available:

http://www.brokelyn.com/why-i-turned-down-a-census-job-but-where-you-can-take-the-test-this-week/

Good luck to you...

lostlookingforlife

Flexichick wrote: Lost...I'm sorry that you are struggling....There are a lot more people than most of us are aware who are just one paycheck or set of circumstances away from being homeless.

I'm not sure that this will be helpful to you, or if you are looking for and/or able to work, but if you are, you might want to check out some of the Census jobs that are available:

http://www.brokelyn.com/why-i-turned-down-a-census-job-but-where-you-can-take-the-test-this-week/

Good luck to you...

I am totally able and eager to work, and appreciate the link, as I was not aware of this opportunity. Thank you so much, Flexichick.

briannak

^ Great! I hope you get some work and it helps you get back into a better position. Once again, good luck to you. I'm not a prayerful person, but I'll be sending you some extra good thoughts.

lostlookingforlife

I'm not either, but I do believe in the kindness of people. I have been one on the helping end in the past, but now find myself on the other side, and while I am petrified beyond belief, I'm grateful for your, and any, gesture of assistance.

(sorry for hijacking the thread temporarily)

jj deluca

Does anyone have a heart anymore?