The mighty, meaty wind emanating from El Castillo de Jagua
  • from the Muddy Waters thread...

    chippenziedeutch wrote: [quote=daveb]
    It's the grittiest, nastiest, grease-caked espresso machine around, but he's right. It's pretty damn tasty.


    I just wish they'd do something about that one air vent that seems solely devoted to their deep fryer. I hate walking around that corner and getting a blast in the face of The Fried Wind....
  • We're lucky that we get that smell for free. They could charge admission.
  • It often wraps it's meaty tendrils about my poor skinny body and drags me in with it's promises of greasy meat goodness. It's good advertising.
  • I agree it can be 10 in the morning but that smell makes me want a cuban sandwich soooo bad.
    But I can also say the same thing about the smell coming from the other restaurant on Vanderbilt I forget the name but Carnivoire knows what I mean ;)
  • I like it in the fall, winter, and spring. In the summer I try to avoid it
  • The best part is seeing people's strategies on dealing with the wind. My own is to hug the wall so the fried wind blows over my head, but the hazard of course is being in the way of the door if someone opens it. I've seen other people using this method as well.

    The other tactic is to exhale as you walk quickly directy through it, so you don't ingest the fumes. (Although your clothes and hair might absorb the odors)

    And I've seen other people giving the vent a wide berth so that they completely avoid it.
  • Sometimes I stand directly in front of the meat fan for 10 minutes and then run around the neighborhood being chased by stray dogs.

    I am very lonely man.
  • Muk wrote: Sometimes I stand directly in front of the meat fan for 10 minutes and then run around the neighborhood being chased by stray dogs.

    I am very lonely man.


    I share your pain and must admit you've one-upped me. I was tying pork chops to my tighty-whiteys. Your method seems a lot simpler and cheaper.
  • Yeah, I guess the Fried Wind in the Fall isn't so bad. It's really awful in the summer, though, especially if run into it after deciding to get your lazy ass off the couch and go run around the Park.... so defeating...


    Kilgore: You smell that? Do you smell that?...Castillo, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of El Gran Castillo de Jagua in the morning. You know, one time we I got bombed at Mooney's, for twelve hours. When it was all over I walked out, We didn't find one of 'em, not one. The smell, you know, that Fried smell, the whole block. Smelled like... victory. Someday this war's gonna end...
  • I hold my breath.

    Also, Muk wins.
  • stacey wrote: I agree it can be 10 in the morning but that smell makes me want a cuban sandwich soooo bad.
    But I can also say the same thing about the smell coming from the other restaurant on Vanderbilt I forget the name but Carnivoire knows what I mean ;)

    Viejo Amigo. (sp?)
  • It depends.

    If I wanted to start a metal band based in Scranton, "Meat Wind" would be the name of that band.
  • dailyheights wrote: I hold my breath.

    Also, Muk wins.


    Maybe... But my pork smeared undies will ride again!!!!
  • Quig, you are in luck.

    Do you need a singer or guitar player? I'll book us at Freddy's.
  • They should start talking with "Glade plug-ins" to market the scent..
  • Oh, in case we are looking for variations, beefbreeze.com is also available.

    Thank me later.
  • You know, I have been thinking about this. And I don't think about things very often.

    I propose that this meat wind get its own proper noun. And as a nod to the cuisine and the people of El Gran Castillo, I think it should be called (drum roll),

    El Carneviento - crudely translates to The Meatwind.

    Pronounced "Car-nay-bee-yen-toe".

    Usage: "I thought El Niño was bad until I moved to Prospect Heights and was blown down Flatbush Ave. by the Carneviento.

    ¿Come on - sí o sí?
  • He'd better trademark that before Glade is all over it.
  • It's like our own version of "El Nino." You can blame it for strange neighborhood happenings, just like you would blame "El Nino" for any unusual weather patterns.

    "Hey, some guy in front of Key Foods just exposed himself to me!"

    "Yeah, a lot of that going around these days... must be El Carneviento."
  • "Yeah, a lot of that going around these days... must be El Carneviento."


    Second cousin to El Chupacabre...
  • One thing missing....

    I have no musical talent --what--so--evah--

    But I may have to learn how to rock.
  • quig wrote: One thing missing....

    I have no musical talent --what--so--evah--

    But I may have to learn how to rock.

    Is that a William Hung reference?
  • Subject: Order now... limited production!

    image
  • My new mission for the evening is to pass by this "meat fan"...I think I've been walking on the wrong side of the street! Two years, wasted...
  • More specific than meaty goodness... Its PORKY goodness. Just thinking about it making me hungry, and I've never even dared to go inside. Is it good?
  • arielbl wrote: More specific than meaty goodness... Its PORKY goodness. Just thinking about it making me hungry, and I've never even dared to go inside. Is it good?


    I wasn't too crazy about the pork chops, but I'll vouch for that baked chicken. I love getting takeout from there. Food for days!
  • Somebody, please get a picture of the meat fan, or at least some good shots of eCdJ...
  • arielbl wrote: More specific than meaty goodness... Its PORKY goodness. Just thinking about it making me hungry, and I've never even dared to go inside. Is it good?

    It's all about the pernil. Garlicky roasted pork shoulder. What more do you need?
    Besides rice and beans and plantains, that is.
    They also use the delicious pernil in their cuban sandwiches.
  • MMMM I agree Carnivoire but their rotisserie (sp?) chicken is pretty damn good. They serve it with a cilantro lemon sauce that adds to the flavor.
  • Subject: windy welcome

    I have actually never laughed while reading this message board but am now experiencing stomach spasms.

    After living in the neighborhood for three weeks now, being in on a PH joke actually makes me feel like I belong here.

    God bless El Carneviento, the neighborhood's greatest Welcoming Wagon.
  • Not that it really matters, but i was just corrected by a Colombian coworker.

    Viento de Carne

    Fuck it, i prefer carneviento
  • I did say "crudely traslates" btw. :|

    daveb wrote: Not that it really matters, but i was just corrected by a Colombian coworker.

    Viento de Carne

    Fuck it, i prefer carneviento
  • The aroma reminds me of my abuela's kitchen in Puerto Rico. Amazing!
  • This might explain the increase in local’s cholesterol levels
  • Fall, winter and spring, I like to use the carneviento as a hair dryer. Summertime I hug the wall while my girlfriend usually takes a wide route around it.
  • OMG! The meat vent! I hold my breath. And, I like to have friends affirm its nastiness by walking them by it and saying "isn't this totally gross? It's the meat vent."

    Blech. Makes me feel greasy just thinking about it.
  • Gran Castillo de Jagua should hold a contest offering free cuban sandwiches to the neighborhood couple that can hold the longest sustained kiss while under the meat-vent. Terrific promotion, no?
  • Subject: split: anonymous guest interrupts the carneviento thread

    This neighborhood watch thing is going well. I see you've targeted an environmental issue
  • this whole topic (the meat vent) is, well,

    ewwww ....
    yuck ...
    odious ...

    and, not to mention ...

    odiferous

    :wink:
  • I specifically sought out the meat vent on Saturday and stood in its mighty wind in order to honestly answer this poll. I find the strength of airflow disturbing but the smell enticing. Blow on, el carneviento!
  • bluedove wrote: I find the strength of airflow disturbing but the smell enticing.


    It could be said that at times, my life could be summed with these words.
  • You guys are not going to believe the photo I got of that thing. Words can't describe it.
  • dailyheights wrote: You guys are not going to believe the photo I got of that thing. Words can't describe it.


    It's not masturbating, is it?
  • I would not be surprised if it was ... but hey, I'm no prude ... do what feels good ...

    :P
  • I'm vegetarian and can appreciate the smell of meat sometimes but carneviento is nasty. Seconded only to a dad fart in the car on a hot summers day.
  • Good one Emily :)
  • I want to know what's so hot about this photo that DH can talk about it but not post it yet. I think he's pixellating the naughty bits out.
  • EmilyM wrote: It's not masturbating, is it?


    It could be said that at times, my life could be summed with these words.
  • People are looking at me funny, laughing all alone in my office...
  • Isa wrote: Seconded only to a dad fart in the car on a hot summers day.


    My god, what a powerful image. Ickily poetic.
  • It completely grosses me out. Its the only reason why I've never eaten there, even though I've heard that the food is awesome. That, and the fat-splattered window to the right of the Meat Vent where they often appear to be soaking chickens in steaming lard.

    Don't get me wrong... I like a greasy, meaty meal just as much as the next guy... but that oily breeze turns my tummy each and every time.
  • I always attributed that smell to fried yuca, not fried meat.
  • Subject: Band Potential

    You realize that if you did form a band called "A Meaty Wind", in 20 years Christopher Guest could do a mockumentory about your reunion tour.

    Think of the possibilities.
  • For our nesxt board get-together, instead of playing air hockey, we should get one of those slip-n-slides and set it up outside el carneviento. We'll all come in our bathing suits and glide down the meat slide, baby!
  • pensodyssey wrote: For our nesxt board get-together, instead of playing air hockey, we should get one of those slip-n-slides and set it up outside el carneviento. We'll all come in our bathing suits and glide down the meat slide, baby!


    You're goddamn right we should.
  • oh. my. god.

    yep, just spit water all over my keyboard laughing.
  • bluedove wrote: oh. my. god.

    yep, just spit water all over my keyboard laughing.


    Woulda been cooler if it was meat spritzer all over the keyboard.
  • pensodyssey wrote: For our nesxt board get-together, instead of playing air hockey, we should get one of those slip-n-slides and set it up outside el carneviento. We'll all come in our bathing suits and glide down the meat slide, baby!


    Man, does that sound dirty. Sort of like the time when one friend of mine said something about "the skin flute" and another friend thought it was an actual musical instrument.
  • I had to walk past this morning to experience it for myself. Yum...that chicken smell made me so hungry!
  • AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! My eyes! :shock: :idea: :shock:
  • Awwww yeah!
    Look at that AWESOME COAGULATED MEAT JUICE!!!!

    That's MAD HOT!!!!
  • Lemmie get a cracker.
  • That is truly a glorious sight.

    The combined essence of thousands of pork shoulders and chickens...

    It's almost religious :shock: !
  • EmilyM wrote: Man, does that sound dirty. Sort of like the time when one friend of mine said something about "the skin flute" and another friend thought it was an actual musical instrument.


    Can you imagine MY chagrin when I when I was finally enlightened as to the term "skin flute" ?? At that point, I felt it was too late to change my screen name and figured I'd live with it. :shock: :oops: :)
  • Where have you been?
    Skin flute has been in the English vernacular since I can remember (Junior High 1980).
    I've had my fair share of talented women perform their numbers
  • Anonymous wrote: I've had my fair share of talented women perform their numbers


    [...sound of nobody caring...]
  • You replied.
    I guess you care
  • Anonymous wrote: You replied.
    I guess you care


    We all care, and the board would like to extend its congratulations to you. I'm sure a talented woman would certainly be able to play a dainty little air on your little piccolo!
  • Why are you guys so defensive or find what I write defensive. If Daveb had replied this way, he'd been greeted with an array of laughter.
    I, on the other hand can't get a break b/c you are all on your toes hoping I'll fuck up.
    I promised DH I would not and so I refuse to get into a petty exchange with the likes of you
  • Anonymous wrote: Why are you guys so defensive or find what I write defensive. If Daveb had replied this way, he'd been greeted with an array of laughter.
    I, on the other hand can't get a break b/c you are all on your toes hoping I'll fuck up.
    I promised DH I would not and so I refuse to get into a petty exchange with the likes of you

    Daveb can manage to be crude without being obnoxious. Despite your labeling everyone else on the board defensive, you're the only one who's actually been acting that way.
    Your asinine remarks and persistant antagonism toward everyone makes you instantly stand out from every other "Guest" who doesn't log in, even when you don't announce yourself.
    Finally, you have never had an exchange on this board that wasn't petty.
  • Did anyone hear that? I didn't think so
  • Alright. Come on. Before this escalates any further:

    guest, I told you that if you want to participate in the board anymore, you have to give me a way to contact you privately. You have not done so yet... If I don't get word from you in a half hour or so, then I'll have to block your access again. Sorry.
  • Anonymous wrote: Where have you been?
    Skin flute has been in the English vernacular since I can remember (Junior High 1980).
    I've had my fair share of talented women perform their numbers


    Wow, part of the "vernacular" since 1980 -- that's quite a long time. I'm impressed at your scholarship. It's truly amazing and you are to be commended.

    So, how could I have possibly been so naive? I'm going to have to write a letter to my junior high school and tell them that they were remiss in my education and demand that they should immediately contact your junior high school for tips on inculcating "the vernacular" into their students. I also think I probably should contact my college English Department ... I'm sure there is a reference to same in Shakespeare ...

    Oh, and thanks for the information about your "fair share" ... everyone was wondering about you ... 8)
  • Why? What's with the ultimatum?
    I'm pretty happy staying anonymous.
    And according to Omnivore, I'm like a book cover b/c she can obviously read through my replies
  • Don't stall. I've laid down the terms by which you can continue to participate in this board. Do you accept?
  • [readies Thorazine filled syringe]Who told you that you could leave the ward?[/nutcase]
  • Oh Praise the meat wind
    Blades pushing pollo el machina
    Wish my nose had teeth
  • Again, another defensive reply.
    Looks like Flute, herself, was reading between the lines.
    I simply said that I've heard of this word phrase back in the days.
    It almost sounds like you've been missing out in the past and now I've become a punching bag for your neglected childhood. See a psych before you go postal
  • See a psych before you go postal


    I've no doubt you have more than a fair share of ones to recommend.
  • I refuse and wish to be anonymous.
    I can take a hint that I'm not much of a resource on these utopian boards.
    Go through my replies and provide me with a statistical check. I know I'm being monitored every time I am on this site
  • A.G. is right. The problem isn't him. It's everyone else on this board. His paranoid psychotic rants notwithstanding, we are the ones who truly should be seeking psychiatric help. We are so lucky that we have him to point out our shortcomings. :P
  • Here we go again. Anything you want to add Flutie, DH?
    I'm getting the idea that, both Flute and carnivore were offended by my skin flute comments. Can I ask why
  • Carnivore wrote: A.G. is right. The problem isn't him. It's everyone else on this board. His paranoid psychotic rants notwithstanding, we are the ones who truly should be seeking psychiatric help. We are so lucky that we have him to point out our shortcomings. :P


    I take your point one setp further.

    A new religion

    Fucking-Retardism

    "Yea and the Lord shall bless those who post illucid, paranoid rants on message boards"

    Cool, I get to be Pope. Carnivore, you've earned Bishop. Everyone else, if you want alms...beer and cash.
  • I'm continually advocating for your continued participation in the boards. All I'm asking for is a way to avoid THIS--the playing out of private messages back and forth on a public message board. You could use a super-secret new anonymous Yahoo e-mail address, or whatever you like. If you say no, then I'll block your access, and yes, I'll continue to block you no matter how you try to log in. Thanks.
  • Um, I think somebody missed the fact that the whole joke is that EVERYONE IN THE WORLD except this one friend of mine knows about the skin flute. That's why it's funny that he thought it was a musical instrument, savvy?

    pensodyssey wins for the day, so far, because of the piccolo joke. :lol:
  • Who speaks for the Chick'ns?
    The meat wind speaks for the Chickens!
    The sidewalk is greasy.

    Just trying to keep the conversation on course.
  • What's the meter reading? Am I close to the expiration?
    What if I choose to have a username, but after I've been denied access?
    I think you'd feel removed from the moment. Stay tuned, I might ask the pope for forgiveness
  • Anonymous wrote: I'm getting the idea that, both Flute and carnivore were offended by my skin flute comments. Can I ask why


    For my part, I wasn't offended in the least. I was more amused by your bizarre immaturity. Are you sure you're not STILL in Junior High School?
  • dailyheights wrote: I'm continually advocating for your continued participation in the boards. All I'm asking for is a way to avoid THIS--the playing out of private messages back and forth on a public message board. You could use a super-secret new anonymous Yahoo e-mail address, or whatever you like. If you say no, then I'll block your access, and yes, I'll continue to block you no matter how you try to log in. Thanks.


    Oh believe you me. Using Ghostsurf and thinking you're being a smartass by obscuring your IP is one of the better jokes I've heard this month so far. If you think you're effectivley hiding yourself, you're wrong. It takes a minute, but it's more than easy to ban the entire IP block Tenebril, the makers of that lousy piece of ineffective spyware own. What's hilarious is you, last month, going off about spyware.

    I got news for you genius. GhostSurf is spyware. Everything you do is logged on Tenebril servers. Notice they have no clear privacy statement.
  • Yeah, I'm immature. You're the name caller and I'm immature
  • FLUTE wrote: [quote=Anonymous]I'm getting the idea that, both Flute and carnivore were offended by my skin flute comments. Can I ask why


    For my part, I wasn't offended in the least. I was more amused by your bizarre immaturity. Are you sure you're not STILL in Junior High School?

    I say guest should only be allowed to register under the user name "Meat_Slider".
  • quig wrote: Who speaks for the Chick'ns?
    The meat wind speaks for the Chickens!
    The sidewalk is greasy.

    Just trying to keep the conversation on course.


    Almost, but not quite a haiku. :)

    Lemme try:

    What is that I smell?
    Greasy meat chunks of pure love!
    I think I just peed!
  • What's the countdown.
    DH, I know you're neutral, but how long before the board and it's usual wits begin to sound like a broken vinyl and bore you.
    Allowing me to surf anonymously is my unique attribute, but you seem eager to rid of me.
    Then let me do the honor without conflict. Goodbye
  • Frame it any way you like.
  • I can't stop looking at the meat vent.

    I kinda want to brush my teeth with that grey sludge.

    Is that wrong?

    Also.... I think we should have a meat wind/meat vent haiku contest!
  • daveb wrote: [quote=quig]Who speaks for the Chick'ns?
    The meat wind speaks for the Chickens!
    The sidewalk is greasy.

    Just trying to keep the conversation on course.


    Almost, but not quite a haiku. :)

    Lemme try:

    What is that I smell?
    Greasy meat chunks of pure love!
    I think I just peed!

    Carneviento
    Making me feel fine, blowing
    Flesh breeze through my mind.
  • Back to the matter at hand:

    Meaty drippings are
    like the succulent nectar
    of endless roast pork.
  • I may have missed it, trying to sift through all the noise above, but... does anyone else think that's a soda can lodged in the lower left hand corner of the fan??
  • I smell meaty wind!
    Glorious drips of dense beef!
    Father is it you?

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