Don't Touch Hot Peppers and Handle Your Testicles - A Poem

Subject: Don't Touch Hot Peppers and Handle Your Testicles - A Poem

The Full Title:

"Do Not Ever Under Any Circumstances Handle Hot Peppers, Raw or Cooked, and Then Scratch or Testicles or Any Other Sensitive Body Area"

The late shift can be nice and can be a drag,
The world shuts down on you on its slightest whim,
But thank the lord for corner bodega and groceries,
Open until the midnight dim.

Strolling the aisles with mangoes, 'nanas and more,
My eyes drag sleepy, hungry, and worn down from the day,
Hoping to find the special veggie,
To help me on to satisfaction, sleepy time way.

And look, oh my!
I love my spicy foods.
These slim hot peppers,
Promise to bring the goods.

Home I go,
To cook up an artful dish,
At 1:00 am in the morning,
Sausage, stir fry and pasta fulfil my wish.

Cooking, chewing and lying back,
With King Cobra close at hand,
Delivery and exceed every expectation,
And I feel to be in a happier land.

It's so innocent in its occur,
The arm moes slowly south,
Down the waistband, to forbidden regions,
To happily scratch my crotch.

It feels good, it feels great.
I get up to stretch and walk out the bedroom door,
I walk to the kitchen but a tingle makes me pause,
A terrible growing tingling, a hot, dangerous horror.

Oh God no! I think,
This has happened to me before,
Having scratched hot pepper on the fingers,
On my testcles now so sore.

So now I sit in wretched pain,
And I do this just to warn,
Don't touch hot peppers then your body,
Clearly, twas' not what nature intended for.


~fin~




Addendum: Seriously, don't.