HAM: Sing 8-Track Classics and Win Mediocre Prizes!

the yarn monkey · November 2007

Sing 8-Track Classics and Win a Ham!
Wednesday November 21 from 9:00 to 12:00

HUMANS AGAINST MUSIC
Kansahamnida (pronounced CAN-sa-HAM-nida) is Korean for "Thank You". In this most hallowed of Unitarian holidays, Veterans Day, HAM celebrates America's 8-Track Classics. Join Bill C. and me, the guy on the laptop, as we take you into a magical pre-iPod world.

Sing low and win big with these station wagon favorites: All Out Of Love, Piano Man, Only The Good Die Young, The Tide Is High, The Rose, Spinning Wheel, My Melody of Love, Love Will Keep Us Togeher, Peace Train, I Got You Babe, One Tin Soldier, Billy Don't Be A Hero, 9 to 5, American Pie... and most of the Carpenters, Neil Diamond, and Abba song books. Cranky Jim has carved out his own niche with his one-man tribute to Billy Joe, "Scenes...", Sarah K. will grace us with her Stevie Nicks tribute, "Stevie, Un-baked!"... there's so much more to this low-tech singing adventure. Ham happens but once a month, so if you snooze, you lose. Hope to see you there.

MEDIOCRE PRIZES!
First Prize: 48 oz Krakus brand canned ham packed in it's own juices
Second Prize: "(M---- F-----) Snakes On A (M---- F-----) Plane" DVD, featuring Samuel L. Jackson!
Third Prize: A fine selection of condiments

Join the Big Bohemian ending at 12:30. We have over 400 GET-OUT! voiceless tracks, but you'll have to show up and hear for yourself.

Humans Against Music
Wednesday November 21, 2007
From 9:3-ish to 12:30 there and abouts
Freddy's Bar & Restaurant
485 Dean Street (6 Ave + Dean)
www.freddysbackroom.com
www.karaokebigassham.com

the yarn monkey · November 2007

Before cassette tape, preceding the dawn of CDs, right after AM removed music from its format we had the humble 8-track player. Who can forget these stellar lyrics from "One Tin Soldier", the love theme from the movie Billy Jack.

Go ahead and hate your neighbor,
Go ahead and cheat a friend.
Do it in the name of Heaven,
You can justify it in the end.
There won't be any trumpets blowing
Come the judgement day,
On the bloody morning after....
One tin soldier rides away.

I can almost hear my uncle Nick yelling "If you kids don't shut up no one is going to Sea World!" These 8-track memories echo in the station wagon of my mind. How about these pre-emo words of wisdom from Cat "Yussuf" Stevens?

How can I try to explain, when I do he turns away again.
Its always been the same, same old story.
From the moment I could talk I was ordered to listen.
Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away.
I know I have to go.

"Father And Son" was written long before the word Co-dependant or Enabler had meaning. How many young woman (and, yes some men) cried over this song because they didn't declare a college major... it's simply known as "Mahogany".

Do you know where you're going to?
Do you like the things that life is showing you
Where are you going to?
Do you know?

If these songs haunt you in the super market, you're probably still "39" and wondering "Which isle might the Libby's Canned Fruit Cocktail be?" or "Hm, Do they still make Wax Lips?" Join us in song this Wednesday on the Veteran's Day Thanks Giving Equinox. You just might win a ham, a slightly used DVD, or other mediocre prizes!

the yarn monkey · November 2007

Subject: CAN-sah-HAM-nida

Human's Against Music hopes we made this year's Thanks Giving special or at least different. Someone made me a Turkish lamb dish. It made me wonder what else they have in Turkey for Thanks Giving... and then I went out for Indian food... where am I going with this. Anyhow, HAM shouts out to some of our happy HAM-sters.

To our first-prize winner TMJ (and Wayne), please read the refrigeration instructions, Diamonds Are Forever but that ham is not. Tookie enjoy the "Snakes On A Plane" DVD, we all are So In Love With You. Kittie and Molly welcome back to Brooklyn, impress and scare your freinds back home with your new slightly used "Exorcism Of Emily Rose" DVD, it was "Just What I Needed". Eastern Block Guy, please Don't Stop Believing and don't hurt the mic stand, it is your friend. Cheers to first-timer The Pope, We CanWork It Out. Lady with the glasses and green jacket, you rocked it hard! To our irregulars, Roger, Smashly, Mz. Trixie, Banana, Mufin Top, and those gawkers at the back, a big cheers. To the crowd that rushed in at around 2:00 AM demanding more, you snooze you lose.

We hope your evening was memorable, special, and worry free from the recent Holiday crime spike. Hope to see you all next month for Holiday HAM. Our second prize will be gift of Gore, Al Gore -- a slightly used "An Inconvenient Truth" DVD. Nothing is more incovenient than the Holidays.

HAM: Sing 8-Track Classics and Win Mediocre Prizes!

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